


A Glimmer of Hope

by Purplechimera



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Lyall is a dick, M/M, Porn with Feelings, Self-Destruction, Smut, Sort Of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 21:05:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18157037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purplechimera/pseuds/Purplechimera
Summary: Remus receives bad news about his mother. Sirius attempts to save him from himself.





	A Glimmer of Hope

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jennandblitz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jennandblitz/gifts).



> Thank you to jennandblitz for convincing me to actually write a smut scene. It's my first one ever so here goes!

_ Remus, _

_ Your mother is ill. It would be best if you could find other accommodations for the summer. _

_ Lyall _

 

The corner of the Gryffindor table slammed into Remus’ hip, but he barely noticed as he bolted out of the Great Hall. His ears heard his name, but his brain didn’t really comprehend it. He was on the edge of the Forbidden Forest before he registered anything at all.

 

Someone grabbed his arm, and he was halfway through the motions to break their wrist before his brain understood that it was Sirius. Remus let go, striding silently between the trees in the way he could only do right before the full, weaving in and out like the predator he really was. Sirius’ footsteps crunched behind him.

 

Eventually, he found a tree with the trunk half hollowed out, and he ducked inside. Dimly, he registered Sirius talking. Was he talking to Remus? The parchment cut into his palm, and he stared down at it.

 

Long, pale fingers came into his vision, gently opening his own hand and removing the parchment. Remus looked up. Sirius’ grey eyes were pinned on him, and he moved slowly, as though he didn’t want to spook a wild animal. 

 

“Moons?” A strand of hair had escaped the bun on Sirius’ head, and it brushed against his cheek as he cocked his head. 

 

Remus stared at him.

 

Sirius gently closed his hand around Remus’, his fingertips stroking the inside of Remus’ wrist. 

 

“Remus.”

 

This time, the words made it to his brain. He blinked and Sirius came back into focus. “My mum is dying.” He burst into tears.

 

Sirius pulled Remus to his chest, leaning back against the trunk of the tree. Remus watched the shadows of the leaves dance on the forest floor, blurred from his tears. The shadows grew longer, and at the same time more in focus and more blurred together. Eventually, Sirius shifted.

 

“Moony, I’ve got the mirror in my pocket. I’m going to tell Prongs that we are here, and you are safe.”

 

Remus made a noise that might have been assent. Sirius shifted again, pulling the mirror out of his pocket.

 

“James Potter.”

 

“Sirius? What’s going on?”

 

“We’re fine, Prongs. Here in this tree.” His arm shifted, and Remus guessed he must be showing James their tree.

 

“What happened?”

 

“Later.”

 

There was a pause. Remus wondered if Sirius was trying to communicate silently. 

 

“Will you be back before nightfall?”

 

“Probably not. We’ll just meet you and Wormy at the Shack, yeah?”

 

“Alright.”

 

Sirius shifted again, and silence fell. The shadows stretched further. Just as they merged into one sheet of darkness, Sirius pulled Remus to his feet.

 

“Come on, then. Let’s get to the Shack.”

 

Remus followed, mostly because Sirius was tugging on his hand. When they arrived at the Shack, James and Peter were waiting for them. Remus brushed past them to the second floor, and he heard Sirius’ whispers as the door slammed shut.

 

\---

 

By sunrise, Padfoot and Prongs were exhausted from trying to keep Moony in check. He had never been this reckless before, not even on their very first full together. Moony had set a relentless pace, scaring all the forest creatures as he slammed his body against trees and rocks.

 

Fighting with Prongs didn’t help.

 

Wrestling with Padfoot didn’t help.

 

Seeking out Wormtail didn’t help.

 

Sirius stared down at Remus’ battered body, watching his chest rise and fall. Remus’ left wrist was bent at an odd angle, and he knew that under the thin blanket, there were several new, angry gashes across his chest. 

 

James touched his shoulder. “Come on, Pads,” he whispered. “Pomfrey’s going to be here any minute. She’ll clean him up.”

 

Sirius backed out of the room, his eyes glued to Remus’ chest until it was completely out of sight.

 

\---

 

The next afternoon, Madame Pomfrey still wouldn’t let Sirius in to see Remus.

 

“He’s very unwell. He needs  _ rest _ , Mr. Black.”

 

“He's not sick. He's upset.”

 

“I think I know what is wrong with my patients, Mr. Black.”

 

Sirius’ hands shook as she shut the infirmary door.

 

Remus still wasn’t released at dinner. Sirius was so agitated that he almost missed James pushing the cloak onto his lap. “Thanks.”

 

Remus was asleep when Sirius arrived. He was extraordinarily pale, making his new cuts stand out even more harshly. At least his wrist looked normal again.

 

Sirius stood at the foot of Remus’ bed, hidden by the cloak, as Madame Pomfrey bustled about, feeding potions to a third year Slytherin covered in boils, and a Hufflepuff sixth year who kept hiccuping bubbles.

 

Remus slept.

 

Sirius watched his chest rise and fall, and thought about the previous night. He thought about how Moony had tried to slam his body into a boulder, and how Prongs had almost gouged him in an attempt to get him to leave his own body alone.

 

Madame Pomfrey woke Remus up and forced him to drink some broth. He fell asleep again almost immediately, and Madame Pomfrey tutted, and then returned to her office. 

 

James and Peter appeared, asking if Remus could come back to the dorm. They argued and pleaded, and eventually Madame Pomfrey agreed that the next time Remus woke up, he could go if he felt able to. James announced, rather loudly, that he was going to fetch Sirius, and would return shortly.

 

Sirius trailed James out into the hall, checked that no one was around, and pulled off the cloak.

 

“I hope he wakes up soon.” James immediately turned back to the infirmary, and Sirius hastily stuffed the cloak in his robes as he followed.

 

By some mercy, Remus was awake. He looked very tired, but he was chatting with Peter as Madame Pomfrey pushed a steaming mug into his hands. Sirius resisted the urge to pounce on the bed.

 

Pomfrey handed James several mugs of broth, though she harrumphed loudly as she did so.

 

“Well, if you’re leaving, Mr. Lupin, you’d better go now. It’s nearly curfew.” 

 

Remus thanked her for her help, and strode out the door.

 

He nearly fell onto Sirius as soon as they entered the hallway. James passed the mugs to Peter, and somehow, they made it up to Gryffindor Tower without incident.

 

After they managed to get Remus to tucked into bed, the three awake Marauders stood around, watching Remus breathe. 

 

Sirius pulled the cloak out of his robes, and a parchment fluttered to the floor. Peter picked it up.

 

“Why can't he go home?”

 

They crowded around, peering down at Lyall's note. 

 

“He can stay with us. Mum and Dad won't mind.” James strode to his desk, grabbing a parchment and quill. “I'll just let them know.”

 

Sirius’ hands trembled. “Why would he...I just… _ We go home in two days _ .” He punched the frame of his bed. “ _ He knew it was the full!  _ That bloody fucking bastard, I oughta-”

 

Peter grabbed Sirius’ arm. “Pads. Destroying your bed isn't going to help.” 

 

The Marauders, used to taking care of Remus over the years, quickly fell back into the routine of bringing food back to the dorms. Classes were finished, so they didn't need to take notes. Sirius packed Remus’ things. 

 

Remus hadn't spoken since before the full, but by the time the Hogwarts Express pulled into Hogsmeade Station, he was at least getting out of bed. He trailed behind the others and collapsed onto the bench as soon as the compartment door shut. 

 

Euphemia and Fleamont were waiting for them when the train arrived, and true to their nature, they embraced James, Sirius, and Remus equally and without hesitation. 

 

\---

 

For three weeks, things were almost normal. The boys roamed the Potter grounds, tumbling around and generally being seventeen. They found an old cabin deep in the woods for Remus to transform in. 

 

The night before the first full of the summer, the boys tramped inside well after dark to find Euphemia and Fleamont waiting for them in the kitchen.

 

Euphemia spelled the dirt off their clothes and poured hot toddies for everyone. 

 

Fleamont cleared his throat. “Remus, I'm sorry. Your mother has passed.” He slid a very official looking envelope across the table. 

 

Remus stared down at the envelope. Sirius stared at Remus. After several tense moments, Remus spoke.

 

“Is there anything I need to do?”

 

Fleamont made a gesture with his hand, as though he were going to take the envelope, but changed his mind. “Probably not. You'd have to open the letter to be sure, but it probably just lists your inheritance.”

 

Remus nodded, and strode from the room. Sirius stumbled after him. James rose, then walked around the table and hugged his parents. “Thanks for being great parents.”

 

They smiled at him. “Please let us know if there's anything we can do for Remus.”

 

James nodded and set off in search of his friends.

 

\---

 

Sirius trailed wherever Remus went, silently demanding he drink water and eat  _ something _ . Even with it being close to the full, Moony was closer to the surface than usual. Remus growled at squirrels and sent birds flocking to the skies. Several times throughout the night Sirius had to change into Padfoot just to keep up. 

 

Every hour or so, he spoke with James on the mirror. Eventually, he called and James was asleep. He cast  _ tempus- _ it was nearly 2 in the morning. He looked up. Remus was gone.

 

Shit.

 

Half an hour later, Sirius and James woke up Euphemia, who altered the property’s protection spells to not allow anyone out. Sirius fell asleep on the back porch, trying to find some sign that Remus was okay.

 

The next day, Sirius and the Potters began a grid search of the property. As soon as he was out of sight, Sirius turned into Padfoot-sniffing out any whiff of Moony, very quickly abandoning his grid pattern to follow the wind.

 

Tracking Remus led Padfoot past the cabin they were planning on using that night, around the edge of the lake and to the front of the house. 

 

Remus was curled up underneath the front porch.

 

Padfoot nosed him, whimpering. Several panicked heartbeats passed, and then Remus groaned and stretched. Padfoot licked his face and slammed his nose into Remus’ hands.

 

As soon as Remus crawled out, Sirius changed back, screaming and tackling Remus. “What the  _ fuck _ , Moons! I was so worried!” 

 

Remus hugged him back gingerly, coughing when Sirius squeezed him too tightly. It was a full minute before Sirius pulled back, extracting his wand and sending up the designated red sparks to summon the Potters. He dragged Remus into the kitchen.

 

“Why didn’t you come inside?” He poured a large glass of water and pressed it into Remus’ hands.

 

The other boy shrugged and downed the water.

 

Euphemia and Fleamont burst in, James on their heels. She pulled Remus into her arms, then pushed him back, searching for injuries. “Oh, we were so worried, Remus! Are you hurt?”

 

Remus shook his head and Sirius refilled his water glass.

 

\---

 

Sirius didn’t leave Remus’ side the entire day. James wasn’t far away either. Remus set another relentless pace through the woods, even though all the wildlife had scattered. By the time they reached the old cabin that evening, James and Sirius were already tired.

 

Moony was even more self destructive than he’d been the month before. Prongs had to scoop him out of the lake with his antlers. Padfoot body-checked him to stop him from leaving the woods. By morning, they were all bruised and bloody. Remus was, by far, the worst. Sirius and James cast healing spell upon healing spell, knowing that this time, there wasn’t anyone else they could turn to.

 

James returned to the main house for food and supplies, while Sirius sat vigil by the cabin’s bed.

 

“It’s alright, Rem. We’re here.” 

 

He spoon-fed Remus soup.

 

“Please, just one bite.”

 

Padfoot curled up against Remus’ stomach.

 

“Please, Moons. Let me in.”

 

Sirius’ face was pressed into Remus’ back, nose getting slightly squashed with every breath. 

 

“Please.”

 

\---

 

Two days passed before Remus got out of bed. It was another three before he spoke at all.

 

Sirius had just come back in from sending his daily report to James. He prattled on about the letter they had received from Peter while he fussed with cleaning spells he didn’t really know how to use.

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

Sirius froze, wand pointed at the still-dusty curtains. Very slowly, he turned. Remus was standing in the middle of the room, his curls limp from days of being unwashed, and he was staring at his socks. 

 

He took a very large breath. “I’m sorry I’ve been acting like this.”

 

In a flash, Sirius was across the cabin, bundling Remus in his arms and pressing tiny kisses across his face.

 

“Don’t be sorry, Moons. Merlin, don’t be sorry,” he murmured against Remus’ jaw.

 

And then the were kissing,  _ really _ kissing, for the first time in over a month, and they collapsed onto the bed in a tangle of limbs. Sirius’ fingers dug into Remus’ chest, searching for every breath, every confirmation that Remus was  _ here _ and  _ alive _ . Remus’ hands tangled in Sirius’ hair and he kissed like he was trying to devour Sirius’ soul. Sirius tried to let him.

 

Remus growled against Sirius’ jaw, and Sirius surrendered instantly, tilting his head as Remus pulled at his hair to bite at his throat.  _ Please stay _ , his mind cried out as Remus sent his shirt buttons flying across the cabin.  _ Please don’t retreat again. _

 

The hard length of Remus’ cock pressed against Sirius’ thigh as Remus pressed open-mouthed kisses across Sirius’ chest. Every time Sirius shifted, Remus’ grip on him tightened. Still, he couldn’t stop his hips canting up, seeking any kind of pressure. 

 

Sirius ran his fingers through Remus’ untidy curls, moaning as Remus grazed his teeth across one nipple. Remus’ fingers slid under the hem of Sirius’ jeans, and even though it was Sirius’ cock being teased, Remus moaned. He pulled and tugged until Sirius was completely naked, and when the fabric of Remus’ joggers brushed against him, Sirius’ head fell back with a groan. 

 

Remus’ mouth was on his again, hot and demanding everything. Sirius instantly gave in, running his fingers up Remus’ spine and pressing their chests together. Remus’ fingers migrated down, brushing along Sirius’ hip bone and squeezing the base of his cock before drifting even further. 

 

Sirius tried to shift his legs, to give Remus even more of himself, but Remus’ fingers disappeared and then pressed into Sirius’ thigh, immobilizing him again. His voice was quiet and hoarse from disuse. “I want…” Remus huffed out a breath, like he couldn’t unstick the words.

 

“Anything,” Sirius whispered back. “I’m yours.”  _ Please stay where I can reach you. _

 

For a moment, the only movement was their chests, pressing against each other as their breaths mingled. Then Remus murmured a spell, and his slicked hand released Sirius’ thigh. His tongue licked the shell of Sirius’ ear as he pressed in one finger, and Sirius gasped, his own fingers skittering across Remus’ back.

 

It felt like Remus was reaching inside to stretch out his soul, and as he worked Sirius open with agonizing slowness, he nipped and kissed along Sirius’ collar bones. 

 

“Remus…” 

 

Sirius whimpered as Remus withdrew his fingers, but it quickly turned into a moan as fingers were replaced by the blunt head of Remus’ cock. Despite the demanding nature of his kisses, Remus took his time, and Sirius’ world narrowed to the feel of his body shifting, giving ground to let his lover in.

 

Remus stared into Sirius’ face, searching for any flash of discomfort.  _ I’m sorry _ , his mind echoed with every breath, every shift he made deeper into Sirius.  _ I’m sorry. _

 

By the time their hips were pressed together, it had turned into a mantra. Each thrust was an apology, each moan that fell from Sirius’ lips acceptance. Forgiveness. Remus pressed kisses onto Sirius’ lips, swallowing his moans as though they were an elixir of life. 

 

In spite of the overwhelming tightness, Remus kept his eyes open. He watched each wave of pleasure cross Sirius’ face until his whole body tensed and his cock painted stripes on their chests. Remus tumbled after him, unable to fight any longer as Sirius clenched around him.

 

Remus’ arms trembled with the effort of holding himself up, and Sirius pulled him down, anchored him to reality. He brushed Remus’ curls away from his face, pressing kisses all over Remus’ face. 

 

When his strength began to return, Remus shifted, pulling back slightly to look at Sirius’ face again. He opened his mouth, but Sirius immediately pressed a finger to his lips.

 

“If you say ‘I’m sorry’ one more time, I’m going to turn into Padfoot and lick your toes.”

 

Remus couldn’t help it-he snorted, and once he’d started laughing, he couldn’t stop. He collapsed onto Sirius’ chest, and they lay there in a heap, laughing, until Remus’ softening cock finally slipped out.

 

“I love you, Sirius.” He pressed one ear against Sirius’ chest, timing his breaths to Sirius’ heartbeat.

 

“I love you too, Remus.”


End file.
